Even SAHMs get sick

So once again V and I have caught a cold. I've lost track of how many this is this winter. She generally recovers quite quickly and this last time I didn't even notice that she was sick, as opposed to teething or in a growth spurt, for several days. Then I got sick.

I can handle a lot of things with grace, a cold is must definitely not one of them. At 3:30 am this morning I wanted to throw a temper tantrum. I was sitting on the floor of the bathroom in my parents' house because we have been staying with them since last week, trying not to vomit, and missing my husband who is at home with the cats. This is not a comfortable place to be. Eventually I got my stomach under control and rejoined V, but I never really slept.

I wonder why, as a body modification and ritual fan, I can withstand seven and a half hours of tattooing in one sitting, two hours of a flesh pull, one hour of a superwoman suspension, and 6" by 6" electrocautery brand, but a cold makes me want to whine and stamp my feet and be miserable? In short, become a toddler?

My mom brought home cold symptom easing bath salts (not the kind that people are using to get high) and offered to let me take a hot bath while she makes the beet risotto for dinner. I grated the beets since her hands cant be pink for work. ;) What a treat, a bath without the baby. Hopefully it will help.

In the meantime im hoping this virus burns out quickly and I can move on to being intermitently miserable for other reasons.

Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.6

middle of the night ramblings

If you have read this blog at all, and I doubt anyone has, you know that this has been a tumultuous year.  Foreclosure, V turned 1, HAMP, relationship issues, cats dead and rehomed...  It has been a wild ride.  In all of this mess, my husband, who I love and who drives me absolutely crazy, worked tirelessly to try and make "it work."  He badgered the mortgage company daily so they wouldn't misshandle our modification application, he was nothing but delightful with V, he tried (and succeeded) to "win me back."  He held me when we euthanised my baby goddess Luna Moth in the kitchen one week after V's first birthday.  Today all his hard work and diligence was recognized by my parents and that, more than any of the financial help they have given us, eases the burden.  I am great at holding grudges, and terrible at showing gratitude, but we truly could not have survived this time without our parents.  I'm sending my gratitude out to the universe hoping that it seeds more good things to come our way.  I have applied, insanely, for a full time file clerk position in a medical office.  Human medicine, not veterinary.  Hubby has been waiting to find out if he is getting either of two promotions he applied for at Target, while he continues to pound the pavement and poke around cyberspace looking for other options.

Wish us luck and help urge the universe to give us a break.  We would love to catch up and be the family I know we can become.  Maybe send a better employment opportunity toward either of us.  I have started a pet sitting business, if that could take off, that would be perfect.  I don't ask for much.  ;)

Things I love Thursday, how the times flies

How did I go almost two months without posting ANYTHING on this blog? What kind of writer am I? Oh yeah, the kind that doesn't.

The entire northeast/mid atlantic region is currently blanketed with over a foot of snow.  V and I are ensconced at my parents' house where we are supposed to be meeting, along with my husband, later today to receive much needed help while the hubby and I are in the middle of our mortgage trial period.  What do I love right now? Having family that extends a hand when you need it, doesn't hold grudges (even though I do too often), and rewards good attempts.

V is almost 18-months-old.  Almost 1 1/2 years.  She is almost 32" tall, almost 30lbs.  Almost out of reach. I know that last statement was somewhat fatalistic.  It astonishes me how fast the time, as short as it really is, has flown.  I blink and she learns a new word, either verbal or sign.  I wake up in the morning and she has grown.  The last 18 months, year and a half, have been the hardest I have ever lived through. I have had more stress, more fear, more tears, more sleepless nights than in the last 35 years of my life.  And yet, the joys, the very simple joys of a morning baby kiss, the "pat pat pat" of her little hand on my shoulder when I pick her up, or her insistance on taking my hands and having me dance with her when she likes a song, these will break my heart with their sweetness and perfection.  I hope she never knows the fear we have felt, the insecurity.  I hope for her that she always feels and knows the dept of our love. I wish I could protect her from the bumps and bruises of life and people.  I wish she could keep this sweetness for ever.