Wednesday, November 18, 2009

Some times you just need a day off

I would love to be able to share a new tip or trick I've tried or am going to try, but actually, I just haven't done anything today but nurse V, wash and dry diapers (outside and in the dryer) and put a few clothes away.  I'm emotionally and physically spent and trying very hard not to be depressed or angry that my husband does almost nothing around the house any more.  He is working more than full time on his own natural landscaping company and working two or more 2:15 a.m. to 8:30 a.m. shifts a week at a local discount department store.  I know he's tired and that is very difficult to acclimate into, but I need him to at least not make my life harder.  I find that if I put something on the bed for him to put away, he just moves it over to where I used to sleep and goes to bed.  If he's relaxing and I'm trying to get V ready to go somewhere and she's screaming, it takes a very long time for him to think to ask if he can do anything to help.  I love this man, but I'm frustrated.  The latest straw is when I text him to find out when he's coming home, in case V lets me put her down long enough to make dinner I like to know when is a good time to start it. The response is always "soon" which apparently does not mean within the hour.

I need a vacation.  I didn't even get my two hours a week this week when I go to a class at my Unitarian Universalist Church, because he was too tired to watch the baby. I had to bring her with me.

I love being a full time mother, but sometimes it is really hard work.

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